ZANA ZOEY REPORTING! Of course, Zana’s not my real birth name, I changed it as soon as I turned 18 since “Brenda Goldfarb” is just a little too Westchester Jewish, you know. My filthy rich father, some kind of Goldman Sachs global accounts manager, didn’t like me doing that, but momster thought it was very tre-chic. BTW: She’s dead now, from HIV or something equally gross, picked up while on a sex tour vacation to Kenya (don’t tell anyone).
Isn’t it just so humongous that us smart and beautiful heebsters rightfully run Jew York city, the Fashion and Financial theft Hub of the Planet? Thank your lucky stars this hip Jewess wasn’t born in fly-over country!
Dada-freaks, I must confess my behavior on the town this past weekend was so totally outrageous and out of control! Or should I use my newest, bestest, favorite word: Debauched? To prove it, I’ll now share with you Internet junkies (or just plain junkies) my latest digital imagery.
I took them with my new 12.3 megapixel Nikon SLR that cost me only $999 shekels at Shapiro’s Locksmith, Electronics and Israeli Sayanim Operations (Midtown, 39th and Broad). They usually run over $1600, but uncle Bernie does a ton of legal work for them and cut me a sweet deal if I would mention the place on INCOG MAN. Done!
[Note: INCOG MAN is now under HasbaRAT Control (operator #15689) and will only be publishing “socially conscious” and “transformative” articles from here on out, i.e. the same kind of tiresome Jew crap you see everywhere else. Sorry, Nazis.]
Here’s one of my favorite pairs of booty shoes. I paid $580, so I’m quite sure they are quality. And at that price, it was a steal! They’re very black, just like most of my shoes, clothes, accoutrements — or the occasional lovers my SO (significant other), Joey Glickman, brings home so he can watch me do them.
I make them myself. Or I should say I design them and have a sweatshop in Chinatown put them together for about $11 per unit, which I then sell on the net to suckers… er, fashionistas… for $600. After-all, my name is on it and that’s worth tons!
Speaking of porn, here’s me shopping at my favorite adult store in the whole wide world! Catch the sign over my head. I just love their budget bins of midget tranny XXX DVD’s and hardly-used strap-on dildoes. So does Joey!
Freida and Arial Rosenberg. Living in the Big City makes us Jews street-wise — which really means staying inside the taxi or limo while going through certain neighborhoods. But we so love looking like tough commie Jew secret police!
Before hitting the town, Joey and I had some scrumdelicious hamburgers from a place we know about over in Williamsburg (that’s in Brooklyn, not Virginia, silly). They should call it the Hannukah Hamburger because they serve it with a potato latke and a dollop of sour cream. Um, so good!
I wanted to go to the bathroom before going out but worried about my “pooformance anxiety” problem. Thank god my new fiber diet came through and I had myself a big old Joo-Poo, as you can see. Stop me: I can go on for hours about BM stuff!
Most of my friends are indeed from the Tribe, African-Americans, some sort of Third-world brownish people who look Filipino, along with a few Goy (I think) Gays, who may as well be Jewish. Come to think of it, all of my crowd are flaming Jew faggots or metrosexuals, like my live-in SO, Joey!
Victor sharing a Pabst with his current lover, Manny. Everybody is drinking Pabst these days. They say it’s truck driver cool but really it’s because all us Jews are cheap as hell. Thank goodness my Goldman Sachs daddy gives me a $20,000 monthly allowance!
— till next time, Shalom from Zana Zoey!